So it began...

There I was, standing before the corporate doors that would soon embrace me into their hold. I said to myself, "Let's do this, TSG. Let's show these mongrels what we're truly capable of."

After an hour of waiting, I do all the prerequisite procedures.

Actually, I was busy reading a newspaper and playing pool with other people who came the same day.

None of them returned to the building ever since.

2 hours later, I get a call. "Your interview was perfect, you're accepted. Training course starts next week. Be there.". After all the formalities, including a binding contract, were done, I started the "training course".

By "training course", I mean stuff most people willing to work there would know for a long time.

I actually felt pretty well about the course in general. After the final exam, turns out I got chosen into the team that's the call center's best.

So, I signed in, grabbed my headphone, got to a free computer and logged on. I turn my head to the statistics monitor, and...

Calls waiting: 57
Longest call waiting: 5:38

I was baffled. Up until then, I had no idea why so many would people call us at once.

Then I got my first call:

>TSG: [ISP name] at your service, TSG speaking.
>Customer: Uh, hello? I have no internet.

Yes. He said those exact words. That set off the retard alarm.

>TSG: So you're getting an error?
>Customer: Yes, I hit the internet button and there's no internet.
>TSG: So if I understand it right, you're trying to connect to [ISP name] and you're getting an error?
>Customer: I have no idea what are you on about, fix my internet.

Retard alarm just got louder.

Slightly paraphrased, of course. I check the logs and I see at least 20 entries with: "Failed reason: Bad Password"

>TSG: It appears that the password you're trying to connect with is wrong.
>Customer: I don't know, my step son-in-law of my sister's third cousin set it up.
>TSG: Then you'll have to input your correct password.
>Customer: I don't know it.

There. With this issue I could actually help without vomiting my intestines out. After an identification I check his password and I see: "1234567".

Retard alarm just skyrocketed making me ponder how people like this are allowed anywhere near a computer, not speaking of reproduction.

>TSG: Your password is "1234567".
>Customer: It's so long and hard! I want to change it.
>TSG: At your leisure.

Retard alarm just exploded.

>Customer: Change it to... something simple like "12345".
>TSG: Done.

At that very moment, my right arm was itching to move to the forehead. I don't think words could describe the feeling of pure disgust I was having.

Given the average IQ of the caller (and I sampled it), I'm hardly surprised this movement is almost on a conditional reflex level.

>TSG: Okay, so input your password into the password field and try connecting.
>Customer: That's to the right of where it says "Password:" right?
>TSG: Yes.

No, it's where it says "Username:". It's a deception made by the dialer.

>Customer: Wow, it says: "[ISP name] is now connected!"
>TSG: Try surfing now.
>Customer: It works!

After that call I flagged myself as "Unavailable" for a long time. Coincidentally, my bathroom break took a long time.

Maybe I should stop puking my intestines out after every retard that calls.