New PTR build and OH GOD WHAT IS THAT

Okay, this normalization crap is driving me crazy. First pet chase speeds, then pet attack speeds and now pet family bonuses.

Why not just fucking make every pet a floating untextured cube that runs at exactly the same speed and deals exactly the same damage? It'll be easier, no more drawing idiotically-looking animals.

But apparently some people didn't learn about Zorn's lemma in college and can't get through their thick skulls that there will always be a max DPS solution and everyone who cares about their DPS will do their best to achieve it.

Now to the new PTR build.

• Ammunition: All types of gun and bow ammunition now stack to 1000. All quivers and ammo pouches no longer provide haste. 15% ranged haste is now built in to Hunter Autoshot.

I hope for their own good this is an overall 15% haste bonus and not autoshot only. If so, the steady shot cast time HAS to go to 1.5s or everyone will jump ship to BM faster than you can say "we probably overnerfed it".

Oh and why not make it stack to 10000 and have us just bring a single stack to raids anyway? I mean it'd be easier.

• Call Stabled Pet: This new ability lets the hunter remotely access the stable. 30 min cooldown.

Still /care. Who the hell forgets their pet when going to a raid anyway?

• Cunning, Ferocity and Tenacity pets now all have +5% damage, +5% armor and +5% health bonuses. This should make more pet families feel viable, while additional talents have been added to distinguish a pet’s abilities based on its specializations.

Absolutely retarded change. Idiotic homogenization at yet another degree. This change is so stupid, what the hell do they hope? That I bring a crab named Ghostcrawler to Nef just to get him shadowflamed?

I took care of that.

• Disengage: Cooldown increased by 5 sec.

Skill I rarely use at rare opportunities. /care.

• Pets now inherit more spell hit from the hunter. Pets with magic attacks should not require a player to stack additional hit compared to pets with physical attacks.

The only caster pet that ever was popular is Wind Serpent and blizzard took care of his usefulness permanently.

• Viper Sting re-designed: Stings the target, draining 4% of mana over 8 sec (up to a maximum of 8% of the caster's maximum mana), and energizing the Hunter equal to 300% of the amount drained. Only one Sting per Hunter can be active on any one target.

PvP change for a PvP spell. Do not care.
Survival

• Explosive Shot: Base damage lowered by 10%. Attack power scaling reduced by 12.5%.

Thus bringing it to its current (live) status. Why bother when it's obvious any increase to ExS coefficient (which you assholes proudly stealth-nerfed) is clearly OP?
Pets

• Bullheaded now adds 20% damage reduction for 12 sec along with its current CC-removal effect.

PvP change for a PvP spell. Do not care.

• Cornered: The crit reduction when this ability is active has been increased.

Still useless because who in their sane minds lets their pets die?

• Feeding Frenzy increased to 8/16% damage up from 6/12%.

Useless pet family with useless specials. Ferocity is still the top DPS tree and the BM talents just add to the problem.

• Furious Howl (wolf special ability) now stacks with Battle Shout and Blessing of Might, however, it only affects the wolf and hunter. Its effect and cooldown have been doubled so that it provides the same benefit but isn’t up 100% of the time.

Wolves are useful now? I wonder if it stacks with CotW.

• Gorillas now have a new family ability, Pummel, which works like the warrior ability and has a single rank.

Bye bye gorilla tank. Brb getting a bear.

• Grace of the Mantis and Roar of Sacrifice are now also available to Cunning pets.

/care.

• New Talent: Shark Attack: This new two-rank talent is available to Ferocity pets. It increases pet damage.

I dream of the day blizzard decides to fix BM by not doing anything idiotic like flat increase to pet damage. Yes, I have better ideas like improved scaling. No, 62.5% scaling of AP isn't normal.

• New Talent: Silverback: This new two-rank talent is available to Tenacity pets. It heals the pet when Growl is used.

So maybe my bear can tank sartharion10+3 now?

• New Talent: Wild Hunt: This new two-rank talent is available to all 3 pet trees. It increases the stamina and attack power inherited from the hunter.

Not making it live in its current state. Period.

• Roar of Recovery cooldown decreased to 3 min, down from 6 min.

/care. No one with IQ > room temperature uses a cunning pet for raid DPS anyway.

• Thunderstomp is no longer a gorilla-specific family ability and is now available to all Tenacity pets. It has been reduced to one rank.

Swipe+Thunderstomp+Growl = good pet tank.

Apart from the half-baked incomplete and otherwise retarded ammo change (Hey idiots, protip: If you can't complete something on time don't bother pre-announcing it to the public), there are barely changes I can say "well done" at.

I sometimes wonder why the hell aren't I the "hunter expert" at blizzard. You know, it might be good employing someone who actually knows their class for a change, since it's apparent the "hunter expert"s at blizzard are mouthbreathing autoshot afking huntards.

Oh and a 4.2k-flasked-wellfed-raidbuffed-almostfullbestinslotgeared-SVspecced-DPS wonder gquit today. And nothing of value was lost. At least something brightened this day.