This phrase almost pisses me off as much as using "Internet" as a noun.
Being unable to set up dialers, outlook accounts, etc... is fully understandable.
Yes, I can understand you haven't engorged yourself in the inner workings of your computer. That's why we're here for and that's why we get paid.
But...
A situation I find totally unacceptable is saying "I'm not good with computers" and giving up on using your brain.
The ability to think [critically] is what makes us human. Not the classification of Homo Sapiens, not the highest brain-to-body-mass ratio on the planet, not anything like that.
However, I feel I covered that topic well enough, though so I'll get right to the point.
I had the (mis)fortune to sit next to a TSG who got an... unusual call. We call those calls "delusional", however everyone knows that's fancy for "retarded". For continuity's sake I'll write the call as it went from her point of view. I just listened to the chit-chat while reading the report for that call.
>TSG: [ISP name here] at your service, TSG speaking.
>Customer: Hello? I can't get to the Internet.
+1, might not be completely retarded.
>TSG: Okay, try surfing through "My computer" to [static IP address here].
Standard procedure here, nothing out of the ordinary.
>Customer: Huh?
Alarm bells are ringing.
>TSG: Open up "My Computer" and try surfing from there.
>Customer: You mean open the box?
>TSG: No, I mean double-click on the "My Computer" icon.
>Customer: I can't see it.
Danger, Will Robinson!
>TSG: Start -> My Computer.
>Customer: What did you say? I'm not good with computers, so try to explain in terms I'll understand.
I saw alarm bells ringing around the TSG's head. Literally.
>TSG: Is your computer even on?
>Customer: How can I tell?
Sweet Jesus!
>TSG: What color is your monitor?
>Customer: White.
>TSG: What does it say on the monitor?
>Customer: Uh... ASUS.
Remember that these people are allowed to reproduce, vote, drive, work, etc...
>TSG: What color is the inside part of the monitor?
>Customer: Black.
>TSG: Try pressing the power button. I have the feeling it'll be a good start.
>Customer: Which is the power button?
The computer vendor should've sold him a Mac.
>TSG: The big button right next to where it says "Power".
>Customer: It doesn't do anything.
>TSG: Then it's no wonder you "have no Internet". You really need a working computer to surf the Internet.
>Customer: No one told me that. You guys sold me DSL!
>TSG: We usually assume you people aren't that retarded. I guess we got a counter-argument right there.
Do I really need to tell you it's paraphrased? I hope not.
>Customer: Well, this sucks. No one told me I need a computer to have my Internet! I'm disconnecting.
>TSG: Good riddance.
That's how the call went. More or less.
I was idling next to her and listening intently. I can testify this being 100% real. I think we eventually put her on speaker phone for all to hear.
Can you see my misanthropy now?
It just got amplified recently, and I want to tell you why.
Our team leader gathered the team on one evening. After a boring acquaintance round we agreed that we have drug dealers, necrophiliacs and mail order granny dealers in the team.
I kept my misanthropy hidden from everyone. Mainly because they didn't know what the word "misanthrope" stands for.
The team leader then told some of his stories when he was a TSG. A senior TSG to be exact.
STSG's don't deal with customers. (I have immediate future aspirations)
Unless a customer specifically wants a "manager call". That's when a senior calls the customer and explains them why they're still retarded. A prime example I'll remember for a long time is:
Some time, they had to fax a customer instructions how to run a system restore.
Yes, going Start -> All Programs -> Accessories -> System Tools -> System Restore is that hard.
Anyway, something was wrong in her fax machine and 2 of the 4 pages didn't arrive. So they resent the fax and it arrived fine. The call went something like this:
>Customer: I deserve a reimbursement for the 2 pages lost in my fax machine because of you!
>TSG: And that's related to us because...?
>Customer: Well, if you hadn't sent the friggin' fax, I wouldn't lose 2 pages over nothing!
She's griping about 2 pages of paper. If I were in his place, I'd probably put her on hold to bash my forehead against the desk.
>TSG: Okay, wait 5 minutes please. I'll call you back.
* exactly 5 minutes later, no seriously, 300 seconds *
>TSG: Alright [customer name here], I've reimbursed you for two (2) blank pages.
>Customer: Where are they?
>TSG: See your fax machine.
See what he did there?
>TSG: Would you like more? I mean, I got a 500-pack right here and I'm feeling generous.
>Customer: I knew you'd see it my way.
These people are allowed to reproduce.
These people are allowed to vote.
These people are allowed to drive.
These people are allowed to work in potentially dangerous environments.
I'm going to promote eugenics and selective breeding.
Being unable to set up dialers, outlook accounts, etc... is fully understandable.
Yes, I can understand you haven't engorged yourself in the inner workings of your computer. That's why we're here for and that's why we get paid.
But...
A situation I find totally unacceptable is saying "I'm not good with computers" and giving up on using your brain.
The ability to think [critically] is what makes us human. Not the classification of Homo Sapiens, not the highest brain-to-body-mass ratio on the planet, not anything like that.
However, I feel I covered that topic well enough, though so I'll get right to the point.
I had the (mis)fortune to sit next to a TSG who got an... unusual call. We call those calls "delusional", however everyone knows that's fancy for "retarded". For continuity's sake I'll write the call as it went from her point of view. I just listened to the chit-chat while reading the report for that call.
>TSG: [ISP name here] at your service, TSG speaking.
>Customer: Hello? I can't get to the Internet.
+1, might not be completely retarded.
>TSG: Okay, try surfing through "My computer" to [static IP address here].
Standard procedure here, nothing out of the ordinary.
>Customer: Huh?
Alarm bells are ringing.
>TSG: Open up "My Computer" and try surfing from there.
>Customer: You mean open the box?
>TSG: No, I mean double-click on the "My Computer" icon.
>Customer: I can't see it.
Danger, Will Robinson!
>TSG: Start -> My Computer.
>Customer: What did you say? I'm not good with computers, so try to explain in terms I'll understand.
I saw alarm bells ringing around the TSG's head. Literally.
>TSG: Is your computer even on?
>Customer: How can I tell?
Sweet Jesus!
>TSG: What color is your monitor?
>Customer: White.
>TSG: What does it say on the monitor?
>Customer: Uh... ASUS.
Remember that these people are allowed to reproduce, vote, drive, work, etc...
>TSG: What color is the inside part of the monitor?
>Customer: Black.
>TSG: Try pressing the power button. I have the feeling it'll be a good start.
>Customer: Which is the power button?
The computer vendor should've sold him a Mac.
>TSG: The big button right next to where it says "Power".
>Customer: It doesn't do anything.
>TSG: Then it's no wonder you "have no Internet". You really need a working computer to surf the Internet.
>Customer: No one told me that. You guys sold me DSL!
>TSG: We usually assume you people aren't that retarded. I guess we got a counter-argument right there.
Do I really need to tell you it's paraphrased? I hope not.
>Customer: Well, this sucks. No one told me I need a computer to have my Internet! I'm disconnecting.
>TSG: Good riddance.
That's how the call went. More or less.
I was idling next to her and listening intently. I can testify this being 100% real. I think we eventually put her on speaker phone for all to hear.
Can you see my misanthropy now?
It just got amplified recently, and I want to tell you why.
Our team leader gathered the team on one evening. After a boring acquaintance round we agreed that we have drug dealers, necrophiliacs and mail order granny dealers in the team.
I kept my misanthropy hidden from everyone. Mainly because they didn't know what the word "misanthrope" stands for.
The team leader then told some of his stories when he was a TSG. A senior TSG to be exact.
STSG's don't deal with customers. (I have immediate future aspirations)
Unless a customer specifically wants a "manager call". That's when a senior calls the customer and explains them why they're still retarded. A prime example I'll remember for a long time is:
Some time, they had to fax a customer instructions how to run a system restore.
Yes, going Start -> All Programs -> Accessories -> System Tools -> System Restore is that hard.
Anyway, something was wrong in her fax machine and 2 of the 4 pages didn't arrive. So they resent the fax and it arrived fine. The call went something like this:
>Customer: I deserve a reimbursement for the 2 pages lost in my fax machine because of you!
>TSG: And that's related to us because...?
>Customer: Well, if you hadn't sent the friggin' fax, I wouldn't lose 2 pages over nothing!
She's griping about 2 pages of paper. If I were in his place, I'd probably put her on hold to bash my forehead against the desk.
>TSG: Okay, wait 5 minutes please. I'll call you back.
* exactly 5 minutes later, no seriously, 300 seconds *
>TSG: Alright [customer name here], I've reimbursed you for two (2) blank pages.
>Customer: Where are they?
>TSG: See your fax machine.
See what he did there?
>TSG: Would you like more? I mean, I got a 500-pack right here and I'm feeling generous.
>Customer: I knew you'd see it my way.
These people are allowed to reproduce.
These people are allowed to vote.
These people are allowed to drive.
These people are allowed to work in potentially dangerous environments.
I'm going to promote eugenics and selective breeding.
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